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164 pages

English

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Miles Murphy is not happy to be moving to Yawnee Valley, a sleepy town that’s famous for one thing and one thing only: cows. In his old school, everyone knew him as the town’s best prankster, but Miles quickly discovers that Yawnee Valley already has a prankster, and a great one. If Miles is going to take the title from this mystery kid, he is going to have to raise his game. It’s prankster against prankster in an epic war of trickery, until the two finally decide to join forces and pull off the biggest prank ever seen: a prank so huge that it would make the members of the International Order of Disorder proud. In The Terrible Two, bestselling authors and friends Mac Barnett and Jory John have created a series that has its roots in classic middle-grade literature yet feels fresh and new at the same time.Advance Praise for The Terrible Two “A double helping of fun and mischief!” —Jeff kinney, author of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid Series “The pranks, the brotherhood, the art, the heart! What’s not to love about the Terrible Two?” —Sara Pennypacker, author of the Clementine series “You don’t have to be a cow, like cows, or even know a cow to love the Terrible Two.” —Dave Eggers “This book is terrible! Terribly funny, terribly full of pranks, and terribly wonderful.” —Jon Scieszka, author of The Stinky Cheese Man and the Frank Einstein series “The Terrible Two are my kind of kids. And what’s more, they’re kids’ kind of kids.” —Annie Barrows, author of the Ivy & Bean series “Hilarious.” —Dav Pilkey, author of the Captain Underpants series

Informations

Publié par	ABRAMS BOOKS
Date de parution	13 janvier 2015
Nombre de lectures	1
EAN13	9781613127636
Langue	English
Poids de l'ouvrage	5 Mo

Informations légales : prix de location à la page 0,0350€. Cette information est donnée uniquement à titre indicatif conformément à la législation en vigueur.

Extrait

Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
About the Authors
Chapter 1
W ELCOME TO YAWNEE VALLEY, an idyllic place with rolling green hills that slope down to creeks, and cows as far as the eye can see. There s one now.

Some facts about Yawnee Valley: If you placed all of Yawnee Valley s cows in a stack, they would extend to the moon and back. (But this is probably not a good idea since cows are afraid of heights and cannot breathe in space without helmets.)

In 1836, due to a balloting error, a cow was elected mayor of Yawnee Valley. (After earning record-high approval ratings, the cow was reelected to a second term.) A statue of that cow still stands in the center of the town square.

If you stand next to a cow for a whole day, you will hear that cow moo one hundred times or less. Counting moos is a popular pastime in Yawnee Valley.

That s one!
All this makes Yawnee Valley a very exciting place if you re enthusiastic about cows.
Miles Murphy was not enthusiastic about cows.
Chapter 2
T HIS IS MILES MURPHY. He s on his way to Yawnee Valley. Let s take a closer look at his face.
Notice the scowl. Notice the gloom. Notice the way his face is pressed against the window and he looks like he s trying to escape.
Notice the way he keeps sighing.

That s one hundred sighs today.
Miles, please stop sighing, Judy Murphy said from the driver s seat. We re going to have a house now! Your room will be bigger. And you ll have a yard! We ll have a fresh start. So a smile would be nice.

But Miles could not smile, because he was unhappy about moving to Yawnee Valley. He was unhappy about saying goodbye to his friends Carl and Ben. He was unhappy about saying good-bye to his old apartment in a pink building that was close to the ocean. He was unhappy about saying good-bye to his old bedroom, whose four walls and ceiling were plastered with maps that he d tried to take with him but were plastered so well they tore when he pulled them down. (He shouldn t have plastered those maps so well.) He was unhappy about saying good-bye to Max s Market, his trusted candy supplier. And he was unhappy about saying good-bye to his reputation as his school s biggest prankster, which he d earned through years of hard work and brilliant thinking.
Miles kept hoping they d turn back and head home. But the car just kept going and was even now passing this sign:
Chapter 3
I T WAS WELL PAST MIDNIGHT, and Miles paced around his new bedroom. It was too big. The walls were too white. There were boxes everywhere. He should have been asleep, but he was awake, because this room was all wrong. And the house was all wrong. And the yard was all wrong. Miles didn t care about big rooms or houses or yards. This wasn t a fresh start. It was a rotten start. He turned off the lamp that sat on a box and got back in bed.

Miles couldn t sleep. Through the window of his old room, Miles would listen to the sound of waves crashing as he drifted off to slumber.
Miles got out of bed and opened the window. Somewhere in the distance, a cow mooed.

The air outside his old room smelled like the sea. This air smelled like cows.
Today was a bad day, but tomorrow would be an even worse day. Tomorrow he was starting his new school.
Miles went to bed with a sense of dread.
Chapter 4
M ILES AWOKE WITH A SENSE OF DREAD. He opened his eyes and stared at his blank ceiling. Last night he d dreamed it had all been a dream, and now he wished he were still dreaming.

Miles shut his eyes tight. He tried to fall back asleep, but downstairs he could hear his mother shuffling around the kitchen, preparing breakfast. Breakfast smelled like eggs. And cows. Although that might ve just been the cows.
Miles ate his eggs. They tasted like dread, although that might ve just been the dread.
The dread stayed with him on the car ride to Yawnee Valley Science and Letters Academy.
Mom, what if I skipped this grade? Miles said. Lots of kids skip a grade. Then I could just spend this year working on projects. You know I have a lot of projects. This could be my project year!
Miles, when you skip a grade, you don t get a year off. You just start the next grade.
I know that, Mom. But if I did that, I d be younger than all the rest of the kids. That wouldn t be good for my development. That s why I think my project year is such a good idea.
You re not having a project year.
Maybe I could take this year to travel. You know I ve been wanting to see the world! They say traveling is the best education.
No.
Maybe I could take a sabbatical. Do you know what a sabbatical is, Mom?
Yes. Do you know what a sabbatical is?
It s basically a project year.
No.
They pulled up to the front of the school.
Did you remember everything? Judy asked. Miles checked around him. He had his new backpack, his new lunch bag containing his lunch, his new binder, his new folders, his new jacket, and-most importantly-his old pranking notebook.

It was a boring-looking notebook on the outside, of course (so as not to seem suspicious), but inside, it was a fabulous notebook filled with blueprints and maps and notes and plans for all the best pranks Miles had pulled.
The Ghost Prank. The Missing Front Tooth Prank. Operation: Soggy Homework. They were all in there, plus others. Two Cats Instead of a Dog. Fish in the Bed. Lemonade Without Any Sugar. Mission: Pie. Inside was all the great stuff that had made Miles famous. Ketchup That Looks like Blood. Raisins Everywhere. Operation: Sandy Shorts.

On your first day at a new school in a new town, you got to decide what kind of kid you were going to be. You could be the smart kid, or the kid who has cool shoes. You could be the kid who knows everything about old cars, or current events, or World War I. The kid who always has ChapStick. Chess kid, basketball kid, student-government kid. Kid who organizes canned-food drives. Front-row kid. Back-row kid. Kid who always has his hand up even though he doesn t know the answers. Kid who s allowed to see R-rated movies. Kid who isn t allowed to see R-rated movies but says he does and just makes up their plots based on the previews. Kid whose family doesn t own a TV and just wants to watch your TV. On the first day of school you could fake a French accent and be the foreign kid. You could bring your teacher a gift and be the kiss-up kid. Expensive-school-supplies kid. Kid who sharpens his pencil ten times per period. The two-different-socks quirky kid. The kid who wears shorts every day regardless of the weather. Today was the day when you could decide to become a new kid and be that kid for the rest of your life.

But Miles didn t want to be any of those kids. He didn t want to be a new kind of kid at all. Miles wanted to be the same kind of kid he was at his old school: the prankster. Miles had been the best prankster his old school had ever seen, and he d be the best prankster at his new school too.
Bye, Mom.
He got out of the car and surveyed Yawnee Valley Science and Letters Academy. It was a squat brick building in the shape of a squat brick. Miles looked around and saw all the typical school stuff.
There was the typical marquee.
There was the typical flag attached to the typical flagpole.
There was the typical gaggle of kids.
The typical hedges.
The typical trees.
The typical school entrance blocked by somebody s typical car.
Wait. That couldn t be right. Miles looked again.
He approached the crowd of kids. Miles heard snickers. He heard snorts. He even heard some guffaws.
There s a CAR on the STEPS, one kid said, stating the obvious.
WHAT is going ON? said the same kid. I mean, SERIOUSLY. Can somebody TELL ME?
This kid was named Stuart. Anyone could have told him what was going on, but nobody did. (That sort of thing happened a lot to Stuart.)
Miles s heart was beating fast.
The bell rang, setting off the car alarm.
Nobody moved.
I mean, HOW are we supposed to get into SCHOOL with THAT CAR there? Stuart collapsed into hysterical tears.
Miles smiled for the first time since leaving his old town. That was a pretty good prank.
Then he stopped smiling.
It was a very good prank.
He frowned.
It appeared this school already had a prankster. A very good prankster.
Miles Murphy didn t know anything about World War I, and his socks matched. If Miles wasn t the school prankster, he was nobody.
Chapter 5
P RINCIPAL BARKIN WAS SOMEBODY. Principal Barkin was a principal. Principal Barkin was the principal of Yawnee Valley Science and Letters Academy, and at that moment, staring at a yellow car perched atop a flight of steps, he was an angry man.
At an earlier moment, Principal Barkin had been a happy man. That moment was 4:44 A.M ., when Principal Barkin woke up one minute before his alarm went off. It was the first day of school, and nobody in the entire town of Yawnee Valley was happier.
He jumped out of bed.
First up was his shower: He spent two minutes shampooing, five minutes conditioning, and two minutes on a new song that he made up about school.
Goodness gracious, here comes school / School, school, school, school, school, school.
Next, he picked out his favorite tie. (It took him one minute.) The tie was bright red with absolutely no pattern. The problem with the tie was that it had a small mustard stain, but the good thing about the tie was that its color (the red of the tie and not the yellow of the mustard stain) was the color that conveyed absolute power. Always wear red. Presidents knew it. B