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No one likes to think about death and many are not ready for it, either as the patient or a loved one. And yet, the dying process is oftentimes marked by an array of diverse and confusing questions that can catch anyone off guard. What are we supposed to do? We Are the Lord's is a succinct, quick-reference guide to difficult end-of-life questions, framed by divine wisdom and Church teaching. Its easy-to-read chapters and question-and-answer format can be a welcomed help to any person or family who are searching for answers during a difficult and traumatic time. We Are the Lord's answers such questions as: What's the difference between medical care and medical treatment? Are pain medications okay? How much is too much? What should I do if my loved one refuses to eat or drink? When is it okay to suspend nutrition and hydration? What to do if medical personnel pressure you to accept treatment that you feel is not morally acceptable? Is a breathing tube considered "extraordinary care"? Is a breathing tube morally different from a feeding tube? How do I know when it's okay to let go and stop treatment of my loved one? How to handle challenging situations concerning DNR ("do not resuscitate"). How do I handle the guilt of making a decision that ended a person's life? ...and more This book is an invaluable resource for direct and focused responses to some of life's most difficult and painful questions. It straightforwardly addresses end-of-life questions, such as the gift of life, redemptive suffering, judgment, and the hope of eternal life, as well as how to properly understand the Catholic Funeral Mass. Whether as a preparation for a future journey or as an immediate guide for you now, We Are the Lord's is available and ready to help.

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Philosophie et théologie

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Publié par	TAN Books
Date de parution	26 septembre 2019
Nombre de lectures	0
EAN13	9781505114638
Langue	English

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WE ARE THE LORD’S
WE ARE THE LORD’S
A Catholic Guide to Difficult End-of-Life Questions
FR. JEFFREY KIRBY, STD
TAN Books Charlotte, North Carolina
We Are the Lord’s © 2019 Jeffrey Kirby
All rights reserved. With the exception of short excerpts used in critical review, no part of this work may be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in any form whatsoever without the prior written permission of the publisher.
Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are from the Revised Standard Version of the Bible—Second Catholic Edition (Ignatius Edition), copyright © 2006 National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Cover design by Caroline K. Green
Library of Congress Control Number: 2019936355
ISBN: 978-1-5051-1461-4
Published in the United States by
TAN Books
PO Box 410487
Charlotte, NC 28241
www.TANBooks.com
Printed in the United States of America
To the venerable members of the Knights of Malta
Contents
Acknowledgments
Introduction
CHAPTER 1
Life as a Gift
CHAPTER 2
Redemptive Suffering
CHAPTER 3
Dying With Dignity
CHAPTER 4
Saved by Hope
CHAPTER 5
Judgment Before God
CHAPTER 6
Principles of Discernment
CHAPTER 7
Specific Moral Questions
CHAPTER 8
The Catholic Funeral
CHAPTER 9
Prayers for the Dead
CHAPTER 10
Our Takeaway
Acknowledgments
I’d like to express my appreciation to The Catholic Miscellany , the diocesan newspaper of the Diocese of Charleston, for its permission to use various columns I’ve written for them over the years. Versions of these columns, often with greater or lesser revisions, appear throughout this book.
Thank you to Father Pau Agulles of the Holy Cross University in Rome. As my dissertation advisor during my doctoral research on the formation of consciences among medical personnel, he was the paradigm of patience and kindness as he provided both guidance and encouragement throughout the different phases of the research. Aspects of that research are found throughout this book, especially in chapter 2 on redemptive suffering.
I’m grateful to the Catholic Conference of South Carolina for its permission to use notes that I prepared for workshops with them on end-of-life care. Most of chapter 6 on the principles of discernment consists of these notes.
I’m also grateful to Crux Catholic Media who allowed me to use a portion of a previous column I wrote for them on praying for the dead in chapter 9 .
Thank you to Jackie Gallagher, Dame of the Order of Malta, who made this entire project possible. It was Jackie’s concern for people who are suffering, their families, and those loved ones who carry the cross of being medical proxies that brought this book from a passing idea into the book you’re holding. Thank you, Jackie! May God bless your loving kindness to the sick and suffering and may Our Lady of Lourdes bless your service to those in need.
I’d like to also thank my nephew, Aaron Kirby, a law student in Alabama, who amidst his multiple other tasks helped me with the research and editing of the manuscript.
Introduction
The Help You Need
Are you in a dilemma and have to make a pressing end-of-life decision? Are you or a loved one in intense pain or in the dying process? Are you confused or emotionally drained and unsure of how to answer questions about medical treatment? If you find yourself in these situations, my heart goes out to you. This book was written specifically to help with the moral challenges that arise toward the end of life. I pray it brings you helpful information and a sense of peace and comfort during your most difficult moments.
Urgent Questions?
If you have urgent questions, please go directly to chapter 7 ( page 44 ). There you will find a series of rapid questions and answers about specific medical issues that are meant to be a quick reference and help to those in pressing situations.
Principles and Guidance
If you have a little more time, please attempt to read through the whole book as each chapter develops and explains biblical wisdom and principles of discernment. These explanations can help expand your moral horizons and give you a strong outline from which you can discern moral questions and find holy and good answers.
Children of the Light
While we all die, the process of dying has never been particularly easy. The path of transitioning from this life to the next is a difficult one, but it doesn’t have to be a distressing one. Distress is caused by uncertainty, which festers into dilemmas. But we were not made for such darkness. We are the children of God. We have been redeemed by Jesus Christ, who conquered death. The Holy Spirit dwells within us. And so, for the believer, distress is overcome by truth . The darkness of dilemma is scattered by light. We have been shown the way.
Divine Wisdom
The pages of this book, therefore, are drawn from divine wisdom, as contained in Sacred Tradition and in the Sacred Scriptures. This heavenly teaching has been given to us by our loving Father, who is well pleased with us. He sent us his Son, Jesus Christ, who accompanies us through life and death. The Lord Jesus desires to show us the fullness of life, as well as the path to a happy and holy death.
In order to be consistent with the light of divine wisdom, this book is written in complete fidelity to the teaching office, called the magisterium, of the Catholic Church. It readily acknowledges the promise of the Lord Jesus upon his Church; namely, that it shall not err in matters relating to faith and morals.
On occasion, when the magisterium of the Catholic Church has not given a specific teaching on a moral question, then the book will acknowledge that neutrality (or on-going discernment) of the Church. After this indication, however, the book will seek to provide an opinion and explain it theologically.
Context and Perspective
As the author of this book, I write with the precision demanded of theology. I hold a doctorate in moral theology from the Holy Cross University in Rome, a Master of Arts in Philosophy from the Franciscan University of Steubenville, and a Masters in Bioethics from the Queen of Apostles Athenaeum in Rome. My writing, however, also reflects the compassion demanded of a loving shepherd. I’m currently the pastor of Our Lady of Grace Parish in Indian Land, South Carolina, and an adjunct professor of theology at Belmont Abbey College and at Pontifex University. These pastoral positions help me to accompany people in their sufferings and in the dilemmas of life and death.
Of course, theological teachings and pastoral practice complement each other. They’re two sides of the same coin. The heart softens the mind, while the mind elevates the heart. In life, we need both. This book seeks to provide insights for each.
And so, let’s begin.
CHAPTER 1
Life as a Gift
Death Is Not the End
If you read the introduction, you might’ve noticed the last words were, “let’s begin.” While that might seem like a strange choice of words for a book about end-of-life decisions, it’s actually a fitting play on words since death is not an end but a beginning. Death is the start of a new journey. So … let’s begin.
No Person Is a Burden
Oftentimes in dealing with those who are terminally ill, or those who are facing long-term medical treatment, I’ve heard them say, “I don’t want to be a burden to my children!” Trying to break the tension, I’ll often reply, “You’re too late! You’ve been a burden to them since the day they were born!”
The comment usually provokes a laugh or a confused look. But the point is made. Love is filled with burdens. Relationships are overflowing with burdens. Saint Paul tells us, “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ” (Gal 6:2).
It’s true that the term “burden” can be applied to love and relationships, but it’s also true—and we have to be careful of this distinction—that it should never be applied to a person. People are not burdens. Each of us are made in the image and likeness of God (cf. Gn 1:26–28). Simply put, God is our Father and we look like him. This identity bestows on all of us an inalienable dignity that must be respected and cherished, even in the midst of the burdens and exhaustion that are a part of giving care (or receiving it).
This basic point has to be made since we live in a culture intoxicated with utilitarianism, which is the belief that value is only found in what we can receive or in what we can get from someone else. We live in a culture that has taught people that any inconvenience for another person, or any service that makes us uncomfortable, is unmerited. We’re told that the recipient of such care is a burden, especially those who are the most vulnerable and weak among us. Many in our culture have bought this lie.
In contrast to our society’s utilitarianism, Christian teaching has always asserted that the only adequate response to a person is love (cf. Jn 13:34–35). By focusing on love—seeking the good in others—we can expose selfishness that disguises itself as compassion. We can break a downward spiral that overemphasizes the hardship of loved ones to the neglect of the person who is principally suffering. And so it is true love for another, made in God’s image, that helps us see the person’s dignity. This realization calls us to order our own emotions and difficulties according to the other person’s dignity. It liberates us from self-absorption and helps us see the good that is being done and the beauty that is being defended.
The Image of God
For the Christian believer, creation is the foundation of God’s saving work, which is fulfilled in Jesus Christ. Redemption happens because we exist. The world was created for our good and we were created because of God’s love for us. This point is worth stressing: we are not a something but a someone , and we only exist because God loves us. If God ceased to love us, we would completely disappear, not