When Your Aging Parent Needs Care , livre ebook

Harvest House Publishers, Inc. - Arrington Candy , Atchley Kim

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306 pages

English

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Description

In nearly a quarter of households in the US, someone is caring for an elderly parent. Authors Candy Arrington and Kim Atchley draw from their personal experiences to speak to and support those who face the challenges of caring for a parent. With compassion and guidance, Arrington and Atchley partner with readers to help a parent with limited mobility, memory, ability, and resources draw from the wisdom of Scripture for sustenance understand the elderly parent's perspective on giving up control, illness, and aging effectively organize forms, prescriptions, care, housing, and finances find personal balance by nurturing their own health, faith, and family What begins as a way to honor those they love becomes, for many, a confusing and stressful time. This resource of hope provides caregivers with the support and direction they need to be spiritually, physically, and emotionally prepared for what they face day by day.

Informations

Publié par	Harvest House Publishers, Inc.
Date de parution	01 septembre 2009
Nombre de lectures	0
EAN13	9780736947350
Langue	English
Poids de l'ouvrage	6 Mo

Informations légales : prix de location à la page 0,0369€. Cette information est donnée uniquement à titre indicatif conformément à la législation en vigueur.

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Unless oterwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are from te HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNA-TIONAL VERSION . NIV . Copyrigt © 1973, 1978, 1984 by te International Bible Society. Used ® ® by permission of Zondervan. All rigts reserved. Verses marked  are from he Message. Copyrigt ©by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publising Group. Verses marked  are from te Holy Bible, Today’s New International Version (TNIV ) Copy-® ® rigt © 2001 by International Bible Society. All rigts reserved worldwide. Verses marked  are from teHoly Bible,New Living Translation, copyrigt © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publisers, Inc., Weaton, IL 60189 USA. All rigts reserved. Verses marked  are from te Contemporary Englis Version © 1991, 1992, 1995 by American Bible Society. Used wit permission. Verses marked  are from te King James Version of te Bible. Publised in association wit Hartline Literary Agency, LLC, of 123 Queenston Drive, Pittsburg, PA 15235. Cover by Garborg Design Works, Savage, Minnesota Cover poto © Image Source Potograpy / Veer

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Arrington, Candy. Wen your aging parent needs care / Candy Arrington and Kim Atcley. p. cm. Includes bibliograpical references. ISBN 978-0-7369-2526-6 (pbk.) 1. Adult cildren of aging parents—Religious life. 2. Aging parents—Care—Religious aspects—Cristianity. 3. Caregivers—Religious life. I. Atcley, Kim, 1968- II. Title. BV4910.9.A77 2009 248.8’619897—dc22 2008049415

All RIGTS RESERvED.No part of tis publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mecanical, digital, potocopy, recording, or any oter—except for brief quotations in printed reviews, witout te prior permission of te publiser. PRINTED IN TE uNITED sTaTES Of AmERIca 09 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 / VP-SK / 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

To Mama hank you for taking suc good care of us all tese years. Now it’s our turn to take care of you. Daddy, I still miss you but know you are building te best mansions in eaven. I love you bot. Candy

he lines are fallen unto me in pleasant places; yea, I ave a goodly eritage. (P 16:6 )

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To Mom and Dad I love you bot dearly for opening your earts to me in so many precious ways; for allowing me to sare te journey wen te road felt treacerous beneat our feet; and for allowing me to expe-rience your spiritual strengt and wisdom in times of pysical weakness and uncertainty. hank you for te lessons of te eart no book or scool could matc. We miss you bot, but still feel your love from Heaven every day. hank you for te butterﬂies. Kim

Contents

Foreword by Cecil Murpey . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Acknowledgments . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Introduction. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  .Welcome to te Hig Wire: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Balancing Your Life wit Caregiving .Assessing Your Juggling Act:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Relationsips and Caregiving Dynamics .Understanding and Caring for te Primary Caregiver:. . . . . . . . . . .  Caregiving Roles

.Long-Distance Caregiving:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Managing Across te Miles .A Survival Manual:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  How to Set Up a Primary Caregiver’s Notebook .he Essential Back-Up Plan:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Formulating a Plan for a Caregiver in Crisis .Interacting wit Practitioners:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Developing Eﬀective Perspectives .Eﬀective Communication: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Breaking Communication Barriers and Understanding Personality Types .Confronting Hig-Tension Issues:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Addressing Diﬃcult Topics .Mobility Assistance and Obstacle Courses:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Aiding Safe Ambulation .Navigating te DMV and Avoiding Treacerous Travel:. . . . . . . . .  Transportation Callenges .Finding Healty Perspectives:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Nurturing Emotional Stability—Yours and heirs .Wic Hat Are You Wearing Today?: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . he Flexible Mind-set of Multiple Roles

.Wen Home Care Isn’t te Best Care:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Lifestyle and Care Options .Money Management: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Becoming Involved in Your Parents’ Finances

.Ear Trumpets and Spectacles:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Hearing and Vision Canges .Cognitive Decline:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Facing Fears and Learning Facts .Social Needs:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Understanding Your Parents’ Need for Companionsip

.Mental and Spiritual Healt:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Dealing wit Depression and Encouraging Spiritual Connection .Seeing a New Horizon:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Coping as Deat Approaces .Stepping onto Sore:. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Making te Transition Wen Your Caregiving Role Ends .Medical Oﬃce Procedures (MOPs). . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Forms. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Looking Back, Looking Aead: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Kim’s Vision Endnotes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Foreword

ou do so muc for me and I know I’m a burden,” Edit said to Y Sirley and me. Tears ﬁlled er eyes as se added, “I know I get cranky, and I’m sorry if I get impatient.” Se talked for peraps a full minute and tears came to our eyes. Se was Sirley’s sister—older by tirteen years—and ad been te moter ﬁgure for er until our marriage. Now it was our turn to care for er. hat was one of te best days we ad in caring for Edit. “I’m not going to take tat rat poison!” se cried out a few days later. For several minutes Edit ranted about te medication er doctor prescribed. hat was one of te worst days we ad in caring for Edit. Most days were a combination of ups and downs. No matter ow ard we tried to do everyting for er, we went to bed wit unﬁnised items on our to-do list. Eiter it was someting we adn’t been able to do for Edit or a task we didn’t ave time to ﬁnis for ourselves. Sometimes we resorted to a form of toug love by clearly stating boundaries; sometimes we eld eac oter and prayed because we felt we ad failed. During most of te seven-and-a-alf years we felt pulled, pused, or soved in several directions. Or as Candy Arrington and Kim Atcley say it, “Caregivers often feel tat even if tey’ve gotten tings under control in one aspect of life, oter tings suﬀer and still need attention.” We cared for Edit in our ome for many reasons. Altoug tere was a broter, we felt it was te rigt ting for us to invite er into

When Your Aging Parent Needs Care

our ome. We stayed wit te sometimes joyful task of repaying er love given during Sirley’s cildood. We stayed wit te sometimes tankless task because it was te rigt ting to do. After Edit died, we grieved, but we were at peace. We ad given as muc as we knew ow. We didn’t ave access to a book suc asWen Your Aging Parent Needs Care: Practical Help for his Season of Life.Most of te books we read were eiter personal experiences or tecnical books written by experts suc as lawyers or doctors. We functioned as nurses, parents, conﬁdants, and cildren, and te roles sifted from day to day. By contrast,Wen Your Aging Parent Needs Caredoes wat we rigtly expect of good ow-to books. he autors sare teir own istories and illustrate various caregiving problems by citing oters’ experiences. After eac example, tey explain te principles involved and oﬀer practical advice for coping. hey start at te beginning stages of caregiving and follow it troug until te deat of te loved one. his book also does someting few oters do: Candy Arrington and Kim Atcley provide an especially elpful capter on making te transition from te deat of a parent toward rebuilding a life. Too many books stop before tey reac tat point. Anoter plus is cap-ter 23 tat explains te forms you, as a caregiver, will need, and tey clarify te purpose of tose documents.

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So now you ave become a caregiver. Some days you may see your-self like te performer on a tigtrope. Balance becomes te goal you strive for eac day. On te best days, you’ll experience some of tat, but it’s not an easy lifestyle. If you can accept tis pase of your life as an opportunity to serve your aging parent as well as a time for your own spiritual growt, tis book can enance your life in te midst of te daily caos. If you follow suggestions by te autors, many of tese practical tips can oﬀer you balance as a long-time caregiver. As you take on