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TAN Books - Costanza Miriano

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120 pages

English

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Wives, be submissive? Really? Well, yeah...and here's why it will lead to a more fulfilling marriage and life!In Marry Him and Be Submissive, Constanza Miriano dishes on all the hurdles and difficulties that real women face in dating, marriage, and motherhood. In a series of letters to her closest friends, Miriano offers sage, frank, and hilarious advice on: Whether to keep waiting to get married (No! Dive in! You'll never be 100% "ready.") How to stop worrying about all the cushy "first world problems" and embrace the true joys of family life (even if it means cutting back on Facebook a little) What it means-really means-when your husband doesn't seem to be listening (he's probably thinking about soccer, but he still loves you) How to maintain your life after pregnancy (you can't! It's over! But your new life will be so much better) How to get through the day after you realize your kids went out with dirty underwear, or worse, no underwear (hint: wine helps)Miriano boldly, playfully, and profoundly takes the lives and loves of modern women head on, and shows how true marital happiness and holiness is found in submission. And she shows how submission-real, true submission, which is about love, humility, and support-will lead you to salvation. Far from belittling women, it empowers them (and their families) in ways that secular feminism can only dream of. International Best Seller - over 100,000 copies sold Multiple translations. Praised by the Vatican! Find multiple articles, interviews, and controversies surrounding these titles online.

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Publié par	TAN Books
Date de parution	24 avril 2017
Nombre de lectures	1
EAN13	9781618906915
Langue	English

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M ARRY H IM AND B E S UBMISSIVE
C OSTANZA M IRIANO
TAN Books Charlotte, North Carolina
Copyright © 2012 Sonzogno di Masilio Editori ® S.p.A. in Venezia
Originally published in Italy as Sposala E Muori Per Lei: Uomini very per donne senza paura
All rights reserved. With the exception of short excerpts used in articles and critical review, no part of this work may be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in any form whatsoever, printed or electronic, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
ISBN: 978-1-61890-690-8
e-ISBN: 978-1-61890-722-6
Published in the United Sates by
TAN Books
PO Box 410487
Charlotte, NC 28241
www.TANBooks.com Printed and bound in the United States of America -->
C ONTENTS
A Note from the Publisher
Introduction: Look Who’s Talking!
Chapter 1: Monica
Chapter 2: Olivia and Lavinia
Chapter 3: Marco
Chapter 4: Agata
Chapter 5: Margherita
Chapter 6: Agnese
Chapter 7: Elisabetta
Chapter 8: Stefania
Chapter 9: Antonio
Chapter 10: Cristiana
Chapter 11: Marta
Acknowledgments
A N OTE FROM THE P UBLISHER
In November of 2013, a book was published that caused an uproar among feminists all over Europe. You now hold that book in your hands.
Costanza Miriano’s Casate y se sumisa ( Get Married and Be Submissive ) created shockwaves as it became a bestseller and climbed the charts of European Amazon rankings. But with the widespread circulation of Miriano’s book, and an endorsement from L’osservatore Romano (the daily newspaper of the Vatican), came criticism from feminist groups who staged protests from Italy to Spain, where they ripped up copies in the streets and demanded a ban on the book, claiming it promoted “violence against women.”
Despite the outrage from some, the book is popular for a reason. Its title comes from St. Paul’s Letter to the Ephesians, and it brings Christian teachings on marriage, from St. Paul to St. John Paul II, to a contemporary audience in a winning way.
Perhaps never before has someone taken such sound theological teachings and dressed them up with such wit and humor. On one page, Miriano will have you rolling on the ground with laughter. On the next, she will have you pausing in deep reflection at her profound insights into marriage, parenting, and the state of the world.
Marry Him and Be Submissive takes the form of a series of letters to Miriano’s friends and family. In these letters, she forces her readers to ponder the reasons behind the moral decay of our civilization and the crumbling of family life. She tackles a minefield of contemporary issues, including the differences between men and women; the difficulty of raising daughters in a sex-crazed culture; young people delaying marriage and children; weak fathers who fail to fulfill their proper role; the tragedy of abortion and the harmful effects of the contraceptive culture; and the many challenges that arise for working moms. She tackles these serious subjects with an endearing charm that plays off her life experiences as a mother of four children who just so happens to be a successful Italian journalist as well.
Mothers of young children will appreciate the humorous spin Miriano gives to the chaos that comes with raising kids and will find encouragement in handling the many (sometimes overwhelming!) demands of their state of life. But this book is not just for mothers, or even just for women. Miriano’s insights will strike a chord with women and men alike. She uses hilarious candor to point out the differences between husbands and wives and shows how these very differences make the bond of marriage stronger when handled in the proper way—with charity and humility.
The feminists who took to the streets in protest may never see the true value of this groundbreaking book, but their outrage is misguided. Miriano has accomplished what feminists have been trying to do for decades. She has given women a roadmap to true liberation, not from men or an oppressive culture, but from the pitfalls of original sin and an unfulfilling life of chasing the false promises of this world.
Since this edition is a translation from Italian, the reader may find the occasional unfamiliar slogan or expression and will find many more references to soccer than to football. But Miriano’s depictions of the struggles and joys of human life, especially those found in marriage and in the family, are universal. It is our hope that this book will help you overcome those struggles and enliven those joys so that you will find strength and peace amidst a world that wants so badly to destroy the Christian family. We hope also that it will make you howl with laughter; something tells us it will do all these things and more.
I NTRODUCTION
L OOK W HO’S T ALKING!
“Costanza, tell me again why I should go ahead and get married in two weeks?”
I reach for the cell phone earpiece. I put the soft drink can away in the holder—thank God for American cars. I need to spit out the mandarin orange seeds. (Dear husband, I promise that one day soon, I’ll bring a plastic bag and tidy up all my Pocket Coffee wrappers!) I’m going to have to clean out this pigsty that passes for a car—the car of a dissolute woman who snacks at traffic lights along the banks of the River Tiber. Right now, I need to turn it into a counselling room—instantly—a kind of poor woman’s Oprah Winfrey studio.
The great thing about friendship isn’t so much having someone close to you who tells you things straight to your face . . . things like how that “rotten onion” shade of highlights you’ve just put in your hair doesn’t show off your new bob to the best effect. Or someone who will try really hard to find a good reason you should buy yourself a ninth black stone necklace because, if you only had that necklace, it would solve all your wardrobe problems. Or someone who will tell you what a fantastic plan you had, how you carried it out to perfection, and how it wasn’t really your fault that the 14 little friends your children invited over to your house managed to escape your attention for a second and kick a ball that wrecked the only two rose bushes that had ever flowered . . .
No. From my point of view, having good friends is essential for another reason: It allows me to give out advice—an activity that I find hugely gratifying.
The fact is that friends—female friends, to be more precise—tend to come into contact with me for a short time and therefore can put up with a quite intense burst of advice from me.
Children, on the other hand, to whom I cling like a limpet, seem to be able to turn the sound right down to “off” when I start my little sermons. And they look at me, focusing their gaze on one of my earrings while they think about the latest X-Men adventure, which they will be able to continue reading when I shut up about the benefits of a methodical and accurate study plan.
As for my husband, he is an intelligent man and has learned to reply instantly, “Right” or “Really?” or “Indeed” or even “Absolutely, I agree” (and almost always with just the right tone of voice). This is a skill that allows him to pretend to be in conversation with me while costing him the minimum of effort. If I have any doubts that he is not listening to me, I test him by saying something like “Darling, I’m pregnant again,” at which point he lets out a noise like someone being strangled, and this proves that somehow at least the superficial extremes of what I am saying are getting through to him.
My female friends, however, seem to listen to my opinions and, in fact, occasionally take them seriously. Perhaps they do so more out of affection than through any great belief that my psychological insights (which are those of a rampaging center back) have any real chance of being accurate. Though—let’s be honest—I must be right occasionally, as a matter of statistical probability, if nothing else.
Normally, my response to any problem is one of the following: “He’s right”; “Why not have a baby?”; “Just do what he says”; “Have you thought of having another baby?”; “You should move to his home city”; “Try to forgive him”; “Try to understand him”; or again, “Have a baby!”
For this reason, those friends of mine who don’t want to hear such advice—and I know that I can be as delicate as a bull in a china shop if I really try—disappear off my radar. I am quite on the ball about things, and normally after having sent them 13 e-mails without reply or after having received 4 extremely short responses to my texts, I get the message.
Those who think the way I do, however, or those who, despite everything, still like me, continue to call. That gives me great satisfaction.
The reason, dear husband, that you so often hear the phrase “Give me a second. I am just going to say hello to my friend. I’ll be right with you” is that, as I have said, giving out advice is fantastic. Besides, there is no better way to pretend that I have something important to do when all hell is breaking loose—like when the two boys are bashing each other with water bottles from their bikes in a fight over the quarter-inch-high head of a LEGO man, which has a mustache and neither of them can live without, while at the same time my two daughters have knocked over a box of tiny pasta shapes that are now scattered all over the floor.
But more than anything else, my female friends and I need each other because we do not have, unlike women of previous generations, a clear life path laid out for us.
Sometimes we find ourselves thinking aloud, discussing our ideas about life, identity, and options, which are many—indeed, more than ever in recent years. That’s why we have to call each other. At this juncture in history, more than ever before, it is important—indispensable, even—to spend a stratospheric amount of money on phone bills (the phrase “I’ll stop by your house,” at least in Rome, is a nonstarter).
Our lives are made up of our own personal balancing acts that are so unique to ourselves that we ca