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Baker Publishing Group - Susie Davis

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91 pages

English

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Why is marriage so much harder than we think it will be? And how could the man that a woman loves most in the world end up becoming the one person that she struggles to live in harmony with? In this biblical and practical book, Susie Davis helps women love the men in their lives with an abundance of understanding and grace. Using humor and wise insights, Susie covers the most common marriage conflicts, exhorting women to remember often why they married their spouse in the first place.

Informations

Publié par	Baker Publishing Group
Date de parution	04 septembre 2007
Nombre de lectures	0
EAN13	9781441224804
Langue	English

Informations légales : prix de location à la page 0,0173€. Cette information est donnée uniquement à titre indicatif conformément à la législation en vigueur.

Extrait

2007 Susie Davis Published in association with William K. Jensen literary agency, Eugene, Oregon.
Published by Revell a division of Baker Publishing Group P.O. Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287 www.revellbooks.com
Revell edition published 2014
ISBN 978-1-4412-2480-4
Previously published by Regal Books
Ebook edition originally created 2011
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means-for example, electronic, photocopy, recording-without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.
All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
Other versions used are:
CEV—Contemporary English Version. Copyright © American Bible Society, 1995.
ESV— Scripture taken from the English Standard Version, Copyright © 2001. The ESV and English Standard Version are trademarks of Good News Publishers.
KJV—King James Version. Authorized King James Version.
THE MESSAGE— Scripture taken from THE MESSAGE. Copyright © by Eugene H. Peterson, 1993, 1994, 1995. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.
NASB—Scripture taken from the New American Standard Bible, ©1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.
NIV— Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.
To Will, the man of my dreams and the love of my life.

I will give them a heart to know Me, for I am the L ORD.
J EREMIAH 24:7, NASB
Contents
Acknowledgments
Thanks to
Preface
e-Group Explained
Introduction
Loving Your Man Without Losing Your Mind
Section One: Crash Course on Couples Communication
1. Love in Translation
Why What You Say and How You Treat Your Husband Really Matter
2. Fight Right
How to Fight Fair with Your Husband Even When You Disagree
3. Making Up with the Marlboro Man
Why Your Husband Really Is the Strong Silent Type
4. Vive la Différence!
How to Appreciate That Your Husband Responds Like a Man
Section Two: The Garden of Disenchantment
5. Missing Prince Charming?
Why Disillusionment in Marriage Doesn’t Mean You Married a Toad
6. A Stalled-Out Relationship
What to Do When Your Husband Won’t Change His Irritating Ways
7.Romance Redefined
Why Your Marriage Reads Just Like a Romance Novel
8. A Failure to Yield
How a Mutually Submitted Relationship Makes Things Run Smoothly
Section Three: Fatal Detraction
9. He’s Hot to Someone
How an Attitude Adjustment Could Save Your Marriage
10. Let It Rain
Why Sex to a Man Is Like Rain in a Drought
11. Languishing Lovers
When an Uninspiring Marriage Might Signal a Needed Career Change
12. The Sexiest Man Alive
What to Do When You’re Attracted to the Wrong Man
Section Four: Friendly Fire
13. Money Mayhem
When Finances Unfairly Influence Your Future
14. Catering to the Kids
Keeping the Little Ones from Taking Too Big a Space
15. The FOO Fandango
Creating Healthy Boundaries with Your Extended Families
16. Happy Anniversary
Making Marriage Last for a Lifetime
A CKNOWLEDGMENTS
Thanks to . . .
My fabulous family: Will, Will III, Emily and Sara. You are my real wealth, my greatest joy on Earth!
My parents: Peg and Bob Gerrie, for modeling love and devotion in marriage for 50 years.
My in-laws: Ann and Will Davis, for modeling love and devotion in marriage for 52 years.
My e-Group: Jodi Allen, Liz Benigno, Diahn (Dee) Ehlers and Julie Washington, for reading and responding with wisdom and truth.
My wonderful literary agent: Bill Jensen.
My “last-minute” editor: Terri Crow.
My friend, ministry partner and publicist: Andrea Smith.
And finally, a big thanks to my publishing family at Regal, and especially to Alex Field for being such an amazing encourager.
P REFACE
e-Group Explained
When I first started writing this book, the process was full steam ahead, but it didn’t take me more than a few chapters to realize that I needed input from other married women. So I prayed and asked God for direction about seeking readers to review my newly written chapters. I wanted to make sure I was hitting the truth about marriage. I desired authentic feedback about how I was handling the subjects. I wanted the opinions of others on various marital issues. And another thing I realized: I didn’t want to do ministry alone.
So I started off by emailing a few married friends who I knew would be gut-level honest with me. I explained the situation and asked if they would be willing to read each chapter as I finished it and then test the material on their own marriages. Four women agreed to the proposal. Since they played such a huge role in shaping this resource, let me introduce them to you now.
Meet my friend Dee. She’s not only the hard-core editor of the group, but she’s also a fabulous riding instructor. For 10 years, she trained me in all things pertaining to riding and care of horses (riding is one of my favorite hobbies). Dee has been married to Blake for 20 years.
Then there’s Jodi. She is the tender heart in the e-Group. Her compassion for people is such an example to me. And she’s really funny in a quiet, surprising way. She has been married to Erick for 16 years.
Julie is our newlywed in the group. She and David have been married six fabulously blissful months. And to those of you who’ve been married for a while who might think she won’t have much to say to you—watch out. Some of her comments rocked my world.
Then there’s Liz. She is a tenacious woman of faith. Her thoughts on marriage are so real and raw you might just feel like hugging her through the page. She and her husband, Steve, have been married 18 years.
With my e-Group assembled, we started a process that looked something like this: I would write a chapter, then I would send it to them, and over the next week their comments would trickle back to me via email. Well, right away I noticed something really amazing. When my friends emailed their comments and insights, they not only improved my chapters but also enriched my marriage. Over the course of six months, while writing this book, the interaction with my friends served a vital role in encouraging my devotion to my husband, Will. As I discovered how they felt about important issues, I was challenged to think deeply about the issues too. As we continued that weekly communication, some incredibly important truths were exchanged online.
But there was another blessing that surprised and deeply pleased me. In the process of including these friends in my ministry effort, I discovered a little community of godly women—my circle of encouragers, who nurtured my faith and my marriage. My interaction with them reminded me that no matter how busy my days may seem, I desperately need other women in my life. I need them because they play a part in strengthening my spiritual life. Their perspectives help me to be a better wife and mother. And most important, their presence has helped me to be a better God-lover.
This small group has provided me with such insight that I just couldn’t imagine keeping the wisdom from you. So I have done something unique in this book: I’ve allowed you to see their responses at the end of the chapters. After the section of study questions, you’ll find a section called e-Group —which is my abbreviation of Encourager Group. In the e-Group section, you’ll find responses from Dee, Jodi, Julie and Liz. No doubt they will encourage you and offer a different outlook from mine. I’m sure you will enjoy their enlightening, funny and often touching words.
But more than that, I would love for you to find a group of encouragers for your life and marriage. Paul tells us, “When we get together, I want to encourage you in your faith, but I also want to be encouraged by yours” (see Rom. 1:12). We all need to prompt each other in faithfulness to God and our husbands. I encourage you to take this book and get together with a friend. Start a book club or a neighborhood Bible study, or make a weekly coffee date with a few friends. Or if you’re like me and close to a computer all day, you can even form a group via email. But whatever you do, start an e-Group. Get in contact with a few people who are interested in strengthening their marriage , read a chapter a week and talk about it! Listen to each other, encourage one another and pray, pray, pray for your marriages. I promise you’ll get far more out of your discussions than you can imagine. And you might find, just like I did, that the meeting together and sharing will change your life and your marriage for the better.
I NTRODUCTION
Loving Your Man Without Losing Your Mind
I don’t recall exactly what we were talking about that Saturday morning. For that matter, neither does my husband, Will, but both of us definitely remember the exact words I said at the end of the “disagreement.”
I looked at him across the kitchen table and said in all seriousness, “I think Satan is attacking our marriage.”
“Why?” he responded quizzically.
“Because,” I stated emphatically, “you are driving me crazy!”
Will tilted his head back and laughed ... but I didn’t. I meant it. I felt he was pushing me to the utter limits of reason and marital civility. This man I love and have committed to live with forever was in the process of driving me absolutely insane!
If you have been married for even a short while, no doubt you can relate. And so here are the questions: What is it about marriage that seems to push us to the point of breaking? Why is marri