5 Things Every Parent Needs to Know about Their Kids and Sex , livre ebook

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106 pages

English

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Real Help for the Toughest Talks Most parents dread talking about sex with their children. Anne Marie Miller loves giving "the talk." As she has shared her personal story and talked about God's gift of sex with almost half a million young people, she's noticed some disturbing patterns: · Google is how kids learn about sex· Kids are learning about sex and viewing pornography earlier than parents think · The sexually abused often don't tell anyone for fear of getting in trouble· Sexual messages are being consumed daily through mainstream and social media· Most parents think their child is the exceptionInstead of sweeping this topic under the rug, Miller wants to change the narrative. In this immensely practical and well-researched book, she equips parents to have meaningful and age-appropriate conversations with their children about sex, pornography, and sexual abuse. She advises parents on how to keep the lines of communication open so that their children know they can trust them with their fears, struggles, and mistakes. Most important, she offers hope to worried parents that their children can grow up with a healthy biblical view of sex as a gift from God.

Sujets

Christian theology

Ethics in religion

Christianity

Informations

Publié par	Baker Publishing Group
Date de parution	17 mai 2016
Nombre de lectures	0
EAN13	9781493401451
Langue	English
Poids de l'ouvrage	1 Mo

Informations légales : prix de location à la page 0,0461€. Cette information est donnée uniquement à titre indicatif conformément à la législation en vigueur.

Extrait

Cover
Title Page
Copyright Page
© 2016 by Anne Marie Miller
Published by Baker Books
a division of Baker Publishing Group
P.O. Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287
www.bakerbooks.com
Ebook edition created 2016
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—for example, electronic, photocopy, recording—without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.
ISBN 978-1-4934-0145-1
Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations labeled NASB are from the New American Standard Bible®, copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.
Scripture quotations labeled NIV are from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com
Scripture quotations labeled NLT are from the Holy Bible , New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
In circumstances in which permission could not be obtained, the names and insignificant details of the stories in this book have been modified in order to protect the identities of the people mentioned. Some anecdotes and characters may also be composites of multiple illustrations and people. If the situation warranted reporting, rest assured those responsible took all appropriate legal measures and action. Any other resemblance of any person or any situation, real or fictional, is entirely coincidental.
This publication is intended to provide helpful and informative material on the subjects addressed. Readers should consult their personal health professionals before adopting any of the suggestions in this book or drawing inferences from it. The author and publisher expressly disclaim responsibility for any adverse effects arising from the use or application of the information contained in this book.
Author is represented by the literary agency of Alive Communications, Inc., 7680 Goddard Street, Suite 200, Colorado Springs, CO 80920, www.alivecommunications.com .
Endorsements
“Far too many Christian parents are afraid of ‘too much, too soon’ when it comes to their kids knowing about sex. Unfortunately, this often means parents say too little, too late. Anne’s book shatters this and other misconceptions parents have about teaching children about sexual topics, and in our hyper-sexualized culture, it delivers a timely and critical message.”
Luke Gilkerson, author of The Talk and Educational Resource Manager at Covenant Eyes
“I remember seeing Anne’s blog post ‘Three Things You Don’t Know about Your Children and Sex’ go viral, and I am so excited her new book has expanded on this topic. Every parent needs to pay attention to this book.”
Craig Gross, founder of iParent.tv and author of Touchy Subjects
“Thank you, Anne Marie Miller, for speaking out about the oft-taboo subject of kids and sex. You remind me—using loving, honest, educational words—that it won’t be through sheltering or silence that we guide our kids to a place of sexual health. It will be through conversation, love, and a focus on our Creator. This book has empowered me as a mom. I recommend it.”
Lisa Whittle, speaker and author of { w} hole and I Want God
“Anne Marie Miller has given a wonderful gift to parents in 5 Things Every Parent Needs to Know about Their Kids and Sex . Having worked with teenagers and parents for twenty-five years, I find parents are rarely prepared for having this discussion. It never seems to happen on our timeline, and the prevalence of sexual knowledge surpasses anything most parents had access to when they were children and teens. Ann Marie’s book is current and on point. Read this before you think you need to, and if that time has passed, start reading now!”
Mark Matlock, president of Youth Specialties
“Honest, authentic, and essential. Anne Marie brilliantly weaves her compelling personal journey, insightful analysis, and practical suggestions into a helpful resource for every family.”
John Cotton Richmond , speaker, writer, and federal human trafficking prosecutor
“This is Miller’s best work. 5 Things Every Parent Needs to Know about Their Kids and Sex is really raw and really powerful. She speaks with experience and authority and has compiled a great list of stories, interviews, tools , questions, and resources for parents to use with their kids.”
Rhett Smith, MDiv, LMFT
“Anne Marie Miller has done the work. Her passion, intelligence, and talent intersect and bring us something truly important in 5 Things Every Parent Needs to Know about Their Kids and Sex . If we are honest with ourselves, it is easy to recognize the spiritual and sexual crisis facing our children today. Miller informs and instructs with humility and compelling confidence. The intertwining of her research and her personal history gives the reader the distinct sense that she knows this topic inside and out, and it makes her determination to win back the hearts and minds of our children contagious. I am more equipped to be a better father after reading this book.”
Dr. David Long, MD
Contents
Cover 1
Title Page 2
Copyright Page 3
Endorsements 4
One Thing You Need to Know before Reading This Book 7
Author’s Note 9
Contributors 19
Preface: My Story 21
Introduction: Sex Is a Gift from God 31
1. The Earlier, the Better: Talking to Your Kids about Sex 53
2. Your Child Is Not the Exception: The Ineffectiveness of Sheltering and What to Do Instead 91
3. Kids Consume Sexual Messages through Mainstream Media: A Quick Review of What’s Out There and How to Address It 113
4. Google Is the New Sex Ed: The Impact of Pornography on the Brain and the World 143
5. Sexually Abused Children Rarely Speak Up: How to Help 179
There Is Hope 199
Resources for the Conversation 209
Acknowledgments 231
Notes 233
About the Author 239
Back Ad 240
Back Cover 241
One Thing You Need to Know before Reading This Book
This is a book about sex.
Things may get a little awkward.
And that’s the thing we’re going to change.
Sex is not awkward (well, it can be . . . in a fun way . . . more on that later).
Sex is beautiful.
Sex isn’t just a physical act—it’s a spiritual one.
It’s emotional.
It’s relational.
Our sexuality isn’t something that should be hiding in dark corners; it should be discussed honestly, joyously, openly.
And while sex is a brilliant part of our lives, it’s also an intimate part of our lives.
That doesn’t mean we need to keep quiet about it.
Since the day the first humans knew they were naked—and they were ashamed—we have been trying to put as many proverbial fig leaves as possible between our sexuality and one another.
It’s time to start peeling off the layers one by one.
Yes, this is a book about sex, and we explore sensitive topics like pornography, abuse, and trafficking. You might find some of the things you read disturbing or offensive. Sometimes the things you read are disturbing or offensive.
But sexuality is not.
I’ve worked very closely with my publisher, my editors, and various contributors to communicate the truth and context of the often-scary reality in which we live without being gratuitous. It is not my goal to shock you with unnecessary details, yet at the same time the subject matter at hand has often been distorted from a beautiful part of being divinely human to the unimaginable and the unpleasant. I have attempted to walk this fine line with decency and wisdom and hope you will walk along that line with me with grace and understanding.
Author’s Note
Throughout history, people have approached the topic of sexuality from many vantage points—some from a place of silence and shame, and others from a place where anything goes, whatever feels good must be good —without thought or consequence.
In regard to sex, people from religious circles often hold the point of view that leans more in favor of silence and shame. We don’t talk about sex. Sex is seen as dirty. A hush-hush attitude can be the impetus behind shame complexes in children (and adults). It can also prohibit natural sexual exploration or experimentation.
Growing up in a conservative, Southern, and religious culture, sex was not discussed in my home, my school, or my church. Except for our youth group’s annual True Love Waits event, talking about sex was off-limits. And at the conference, all we were told was “Don’t have sex.”
Nobody dared ask why .
Keeping talk about sex under wraps definitely had an impact on my formative years (I’ll share my story in a few pages). And now, after twenty-something years, with God’s providence and maybe a little bit of his humor, he has firmly planted in my heart a passion to change the conversation.
Sex is not a subject to avoid. Sex is a gift from God to us to celebrate and enjoy.
We, the church, cannot keep quiet about the subject of sex any longer. Because of the broken world in which we live, adults and children are presented with a distorted image of sexuality at each and every turn. This distorted image affects us in all areas of our lives, including our spirituality, our relationships, and our worldview.
As you work through this book, you’ll inevitably see that my conservative religious background didn’t scar me for life. I’m still involved in church, I work in full-time ministry, and, to set the tone of this book, I love sex! * My beliefs (having been shaped by what I understand the Bible to say and my own life experiences) construct and direct my