Wrestlecrap , livre ebook

Ecw Press - Randy Baer

Découvre YouScribe en t'inscrivant gratuitement

Je m'inscris

Obtenez un accès à la bibliothèque pour le consulter en ligne
En savoir plus

123 pages

English

Vous pourrez modifier la taille du texte de cet ouvrage

Obtenez un accès à la bibliothèque pour le consulter en ligne
En savoir plus

A propos
Informations
Extrait

Description

This retrospective look at the wrestling world's worst characters and most foolish attempts to attract viewers will leave fans and critics alike in stitches.

Sujets

Humour

Informations

Publié par	Ecw Press
Date de parution	16 décembre 2010
Nombre de lectures	0
EAN13	9781554905447
Langue	English

Informations légales : prix de location à la page 0,0400€. Cette information est donnée uniquement à titre indicatif conformément à la législation en vigueur.

Extrait

WrestleCrap
The Very Worst of Pro Wrestling
R.D. Reynolds with Randy Baer

Copyright © ECW Press, 2003
Published by ECW Press 2120 Queen Street East, Suite 200, Toronto, Ontario, Canada M4E 1E2
416.694.3348 / info@ecwpress.com
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system,
or transmitted in any form by any process — electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording,
or otherwise — without the prior written permission of the copyright owners and ECW press.
NATIONAL LIBRARY OF CANADA CATALOGUING IN PUBLICATION DATA
Reynolds, R.D., 1969-
WrestleCrap: the very worst of professional wrestling/R.D. Reynolds with Randy Baer.
ISBN-10: 1-55022-584-7
ISBN-13: 978-1-55022-584-6
1. Wrestling—Miscellanea. I. Baer, Randy II. Title.
GV1195.R49 2003 796.812 C2003-902188-2
Acquisition and production: Emma McKay, Copy editor: Kevin Flynn Text design and typesetting: Guylaine Régimbald — Solo Design Cover design: Jon Heilman Front cover photos: Kiss Demon (top left) and Papa Shango (bottom right) by John Lawson; Giant Gonzalez (top right) and Double Doink (bottom left) by Jeff Cohen
Back cover photos: Dink and Doink by John Lawson; The Narcissist by Jeff Cohen
This book is set in Cronos
6 8 10 9 7 5
Printing: Transcontinental
Printed and bound in Canada

Dedicated to the memory of my good friend, Merle Vincent Griggs

I would like to thank the following people for making this book a reality:
John Tenta
Eric Kuehling
Casey Stephon
Dan Garza
Jeff Cohen
Jon Heilman
Anna Poltorak
Alfonzo Tyson
Madison Carter
Wild Bill Brown
Greg Oliver
John Lawson
Kevin Flynn
Troy Ferguson
Blade Braxton
Daniel “M2K” Frantz
Larry “Tiptonium” Tipton
Rick Scaia
Scott Keith
Bryan Alvarez
Miss Galatea
Jason H. Smith
Mark Manford
Andre J. Beaucage
Terry and Sally Corman, as well as everyone at Firehouse Image Center
Xavier Doom's Slayground
Greg Ogorek at GlobalInternet.net
Emma McKay and everyone at ECW Press
Loyal WrestleCrappers everywhere
And most of all, to my wife and family, for putting up with my wrestling obsession
Special thanks to God above, for helping me to get through watching all this junk
Foreword
by John Tenta
My name is John Tenta. It's a name that's familiar to some people in the world of professional wrestling, but unfamiliar to some others. Here in Japan, I am known as John Tenta, or as Koto Tenzan, my former name in professional sumo wrestling But most of you likely know me by my former WWF or WCW ring names: Earthquake, Avalanche, Shark, and Golga the Human Oddity.
I am sitting in a dressing room in Korakoen Hall in Tokyo, Japan. This building has a rich history of pro wrestling, hosting matches anywhere from two to six times a month. Literally thousands of wrestlers have passed through this venue during their careers; others have only dreamed of it. Countless legends of wrestling have competed here, like Giant Baba, Antonio Inoki, Jumbo Tsuruta, Bruiser Brody, Stan Hansen, Abdullah the Butcher, the Funks, Harley Race, and Ric Flair. The list goes on and on and on.
But I am not here to talk about past wrestling champions. No, I'm here to introduce you to a friend of mine, R.D. Reynolds. R.D. has taken the time and effort to compile some of the worst characters and story lines in the history of professional wrestling in the book you now hold in your hands.
So why have I been talking about Japan? Well, it's because it was in this very building, some fifteen years ago, that a boy's dream came true. My dream. It is here that, at the age of 24, I had my debut match as a professional wrestler, something I had dreamed of since I was six years old.
Mine is just one story of dreams that have come true for thousands of wrestlers. I remember dreaming as a boy that I would one day be a world champion. And although that wish never became a reality, I take pride in the fact that I was one half of the WWF Tag Team Champions known as the Natural Disasters, along with my good friend Typhoon. I am also proud of the fact that I wrestled against world champions such as “Macho Man” Randy Savage, the Ultimate Warrior, and Sting, and, in the highlight of my career, against Hulk Hogan at SummerSlam. There I was, in the main event of one of the biggest shows of the year with one of the biggest stars in the history of the business. It is something I will never forget.
I'll never forget being the Shark, either, but not for the same reasons. No one knows for certain whether a wrestler's gimmick will work or fall flat on its face. It's the fans who decide. All that we can do, as wrestlers, is give it our best shot. I didn't like dressing up as a shark, but it was what I was given to do, and I did my best. Some fans even had some fun with it. When fans come up to me now, they inevitably recite an interview I did at the end of the gimmick. “I'm not a shark,” I said on Nitro. “I'm a man. I'm John Tenta.” People remember that, so I guess I did my job.
I actually enjoyed being an Oddity, although I shouldn't have. After all, I was under a mask, so people couldn't even see my face. It really felt like Vince McMahon was punishing me for having deserted the WWF for WCW three years earlier. I still had fun with it, though. I laughed as I danced with the rest of the Oddities, and the fans would dance along. It didn't matter whether we won or lost; we'd dance anyway. It was a short run, but it was a lot of fun.
Being the Shark and being an Oddity — that was WrestleCrap, no doubt about it. But it was also kind of funny. Unlike some folks in this business, I can laugh at it, because I can laugh at myself.

John Tenta back before they made him a shark, and his partner Typhoon before they obscured his vision with a stormtrooper helmet and shoved him through a wall. [Photo: John Lawson]

I can also laugh at my friends. Who can forget my former partner Typhoon as the Shockmaster in WCW? I know he wishes that he could. He was actually set for a huge push, but maybe the push was a little too big; during his first big entrance he stumbled through a hole in a wall that he'd just burst through. What was that I was saying about some gimmicks falling flat on their faces? Maybe his head, which was covered in a storm-trooper helmet, was getting too big?
Just kidding, Typh — you know I love you.
Hell, Typhoon was the best partner anyone could hope for. He's a true friend, with a heart as big as his huge frame. I knew that if we ever got into trouble, in or out of the ring, he'd be there for me. He's a great man and a great friend, and I still don't believe he knows just how strong he really is.
And there's something that unites the two of us in an unbreakable bond: we've both been saddled with WrestleCrap.
I guess that there have been and continue to be bad gimmicks that simply don't work, just as there will always be bad gimmicks that actually get over for some reason or other. I remember Vince McMahon once saying that he could make a star out of anyone. I can't argue that point. He took two WCW outcasts and made them two of the biggest names ever in wrest- ling: “Stone Cold” Steve Austin and Triple H. Their potential was never realized in WCW, because Eric Bischoff, who ran the promotion, depended on proven stars. Bischoff never gave new guys a chance to succeed. He never knew how to create stars. In fact, I believe that if it hadn't been for the WWF, and the stars that Vince McMahon made who left for WCW, there never would have been a ratings war between Nitro and Raw. So where's Bischoff now? And where's WCW?
Vince McMahon owns them both.
It's all in the presentation, and it's up to the wrestlers to do their best with what they're given. Austin's and Hunter Hearst Helmsley's initial stints in the WWF weren't anything to write home about, but both they and Vince stuck with it until they achieved success. Hunter could have given up on his original gimmick as a snotty blueblood. He didn't. Austin could have floundered as the Ringmaster, but he just kept trying. And Vince gave them both the chance to succeed.
I too have had my share of lame gimmicks, but I hold my head high. I did the best I could with what I was given, and, fortunately, I have never had to do anything that would embarrass my wife or my family. Remember when I squashed Jake Roberts's pet snake, Damien? And made snakeburgers out of him? Was that WrestleCrap? You're darn right it was, but it was funny.
Some people hated me for that. Great! That's just what I was going for. They hated me in my WWF debut when I came out of the audience and squashed the Ultimate Warrior. They hated me when I put Hulk Hogan out of the WWF. They hated me when I killed Jake's snake. They hated me when I destroyed Andre the Giant's knee, putting him out of the WWF. And they hated me when I turned Tugboat into Typhoon.
Now ask yourself this: did I make the people hate me, or did Vince McMahon and his matchmakers do it? Vince was the director, and I filled the role. It made me a star. Earthquake became a hated name. That is what we wrestlers do; whether good or bad, we try our best to succeed at the roles we are given. For every Stone Cold, there are a hundred Sharks.
But underneath the gimmicks, wrestlers are all just men and women trying hard to be successful in their jobs. We're trying to climb that ladder to the top, even though the ladder may have a few rungs missing or be a little short. We do what is asked of us. Sometimes people ask me why I agreed to play the role of a fish man. The answer is plain and simple: if I hadn't, there were plenty of other people who would have. I just wanted to be able to provide for my family. I was just a guy trying to make a living. Take away my gimmicks, good and bad, and I'm a regular person just like you.
With that in mind, it is with pleasure that I now hand the reins of this book over to its author and a true lover of pro wrestling: R.D. Reynolds. I hope