Life, Death, the Universe, and Some Other Stuff , livre ebook

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68 pages

English

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Exciting, awe inspiring adventures transport the author from childhood to manhood through his fascinating, humorous, and sometimes heartfelt true life stories.
This book is all TRUE! It is short stories about an ever curious individual free to explore the world around him, focusing on animals and wildlife, and having extraordinary adventures. I could not put the book down, and still wanted MORE! Heglin is a gifted writer who keeps the narrative moving fast. You will smile throughout his adventures, even though with some you gasp with apprehension!
Connie Muther, author, consultant, lecturer and educator
Heglin writes with the wit and richly complex narrative of Mark Twain and the folksy narrative vigor of Garrison Keillor…Inevitably, each story leaves me hungry for the next adventure.
Barbara Rose: Award-winning Multimedia Producer/Director, Writer, Director of Development Film/TV, Producer of RacigNellieBly.com and graduate in English and Comparative Literature.

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Performing Arts

Biography

Entertainment

Autobiography

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Publié par	AuthorHouse
Date de parution	06 décembre 2022
Nombre de lectures	0
EAN13	9781665575829
Langue	English
Poids de l'ouvrage	3 Mo

Informations légales : prix de location à la page 0,0200€. Cette information est donnée uniquement à titre indicatif conformément à la législation en vigueur.

Extrait

LIFE, DEATH, THE UNIVERSE, AND SOME OTHER STUFF

JOHN C. HEGLIN

© 2022 John C. Heglin. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

AuthorHouse™
1663 Liberty Drive
Bloomington, IN 47403
www.authorhouse.com
Phone: 833-262-8899

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

ISBN: 978-1-6655-7581-2 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-6655-7582-9 (e)

Published by AuthorHouse 11/23/2022

To Arlene, Barby, and Connie, the people who belie ved I could write before I believed it my self.
Contents

About the Author
Foreword
Preface
How Bugs Bunny Saved my Life
Day of the Dogs
Conversing with Crows
The Lighthouse Mother
A Whale of an Adventure
The Problem with Poaching Pumpkins
Some Mammoth Undertakings
A Ghostly Story
The Flood of ’78
A Fish Named Fluffy
The Case of the Reluctant Pilot, Or, My Other Car Is a Nuclear Aircraft Carrier
Swimming with Sharks
About the Author

J ohn C. Heglin was born in Florida, but grew up in the San Fernando Valley near L.A. When he was thirteen, he moved with his family to the San Diego area, to which he has returned periodically amid numerous world-traveling adventures, experiencing life from being homeless to well-heeled.
As a student of psychology, he attended both the University of San Diego and Grossmont College, where he also taught for a time.

JCH in author’s Russian dance suite
Still going strong in his sixth decade, John has been a professional dancer / choreographer and educator his whole life. He taught grade levels from first grade through college.
However, to supplement that income, he has also been a working counselor, a jeweler, an architectural model builder, has worked in the heart of nuclear reactors, has rebuilt houses, and been a merchant marine. He is an award-winning artist whose work has been displayed in museums, and an award-winning patented inventor.
His adventurous spirit led him to climb some of the highest peaks on the continent solo, swim in the sea more than a hundred miles from any land, take the controls of a plane high above the earth, and clamber alone through caves deep within it.
He is now an over-worked apple farmer during his “retirement,” living with his “Wonder Muffin” Arlene, fifteen chickens, and a pet chinchilla.
Foreword

I was profoundly lonely as a young teen when my sister dragged me to a folk dance in Balboa Park, insisting there was someone I had to know. That someone was John Heglin, with his confident dancer’s posture, shock of curly blonde hair and piercing blue eyes that saw to the core of my being. From the moment he took my sweaty hand on that warm summer night to guide me onto the dance floor, we were soul mates. Sadly, my sister has long since disappeared from our lives. But I thank her; she could not have been more insightful. Although we lost her, we were no longer alone. Through more years than I will admit, John and I have remained as close as that first glorious, floor-grazing waltz—no matter how many miles life has wedged between us.
Through the years we shared our daily stories in person or by phone--from miserable, to tragic, to joyful. His background in psychology, combined with an astonishing capacity for love, proved him to be an empathetic, tireless and very wise listener. Sharing trauma-filled childhoods, the union of our spirits allowed us to forge an invincible capacity to transform turmoil into tranquility and heartbreak into laughter. No matter how hard the world pushes against us, our connection is always more powerful.
Without John, I would not be here.
But I assure you, he was not one to simply sit back and listen. He was also a delightful raconteur with a deceptively easy style that would catch me off guard every time. As you will discover, his stories are wildly amusing and captivating. Those of us who have been fortunate to hear him tell these stories encouraged him to commit them to the printed word.
I am happy to say that I experienced many of his stories in this book first hand. I knew him shortly after his early childhood stories when they were still fresh in his mind and I bore witness to the later ones, usually within hours of their occurrence. I assure you, they are wild, weird, and sometimes insane--and all are true. With the wit and richly complex narrative of Mark Twain and the folksy narrative vigor of Garrison Keillor, I personally choose to read these stories one at a time, so I can savor every moment. Inevitably, each story leaves me hungry for the next adventure.
Barbara Rose: Award-winning Multimedia Producer/Director, Writer, Director of Development Film/TV, Producer of RacigNellieBly.com and graduate in English and Comparative Literature.
Preface

I t was a dark and stormy night the night I was born.
Well, at least it must have been somewhere, this is a big planet after all. As for the weather in the little seaside Florida town I was born in, I have no idea. You see, I was very young when I was born, and I can’t say as I remember.

Author on High
I have been told that I needed to write a preface. This is something I’ve never done or even tried to do before. However, I shall endeavor to try to do so now.
Already I am uncomfortable with the number of times I have written the word “I.” Although, seeing as these are all actual stories about my actual life, I guess it is somewhat appropriate. About these stories, I can only say that they are all true, and as absolutely accurate as humanly possible. As an indication of the sincerity of my attempt at accuracy, the reader may notice a general lack of dialogue. This is because although I, at this point, have a very clear recollection of the pertinent events, I am not as certain of what was word for word said, and by whom, and I wouldn’t want to falsely put words in anyone’s mouth.
I would also like to apologize up front for a certain amount of redundancies present between some of the stories. These offerings were, in fact, written to be individual stories, and stand on their own. Therefore, some of the necessary background setup will seem familiar to the reader persistent enough to make their way through more than a few of my adventures.
As for the stories, again, they are my true-life experiences. After relating some of these adventures to friends on various social occasions, said friends implored me to record them in a more permanent fashion. Only after repeated and insistent cajoling did I reluctantly acquiesce to putting pen to paper. Or, more accurately, putting fingers to keyboard.
My origin could be accurately, although speaking figuratively, described as dark and stormy. Due to a confluence of unfortunate circumstances, I was unloved and unwanted from birth. Many feel this way, but my feelings were solidly confirmed when I accidentally overheard a conversation between my parents and my shocked and incredulous uncle wherein they laid out the whole unfortunate story. Hey, what are the chances huh? And, I know, I know, “woe is me!” This is not a complaint, however, nor is it the general tone of this book, just a part of my former reality.
Perhaps at some later time I’ll relate that small novel, but that is not what these stories are about. In fact, if anything, that situation made the circumstances that led to many of these stories possible. You see, unwanted translates to largely unsupervised, and unsupervised leaves one open to opportunities for exploration and adventure. Exploration and adventure often lead to self-sufficiency and endless curiosity, and oh how that formula worked on me!
I have always wanted to know everything about everything. About science and nature and history and humanity and love, especially love, something I knew so little of throughout my early life. Unlike most people, I learned about love through logic and reason, and that has served me remarkably well in life, so far. I have found within myself a tremendous capacity to love, and accept love from others.
And death! I was curious as hell about death. So far, I have, through no fault of my own, had the dubious good fortune to have been technically dead, heart stopped and all that, on four separate occasions. Cool huh? People have said, and I have found this to be true, that the best way to learn about something is to do it. I guess I may have to write about that someday as well.
Until then, I have but these few humble stories to offer. And with them my hope that they may inspire you, dear reader, to find your own personal curiosity about Life, Death, The Universe, and Some Other Stuff.
How Bugs Bunny Saved my Life

I t may sound hard to believe to some, but it is nevertheless true, that were it not for Bugs Bunny (yes, the cartoon “wascally wabbit”), I would not be here to relate this story.
It must have been late summer of 1964, just before school started. It took place in Placerita Canyon, just north of the San Fernando Valley in the Angeles National Forest, at a primitive campground with only about five camp sites consistin